Santa: the Myth, the Magic, and the Monster

I was reminded that I still haven't gotten around to talking about my Santa conundrum.  I know it's not quite the season yet (in fact, I need to pull out Halloween decorations), but that doesn't stop most of the shops in this country and it won't stop me.  Okay, first, you have to understand that the Yeti and I have been together for over a decade, and been adults for most of that.  So here's what our life has been like, pre-Thumper:

Me: My side of the family is pretty much lapsed Irish Catholic, but by the time I came into the picture it was pretty generic secular.  Celebrated Christmas and Easter, didn't belong to a church.  As an adult, I love the spirit of Christmas - the lights, the magic, the powering through the long winter with a party, the peace on Earth, goodwill towards men sort of thing.  I'm not religious, so I don't see anything wrong with celebrating all sorts of winter traditions, and it interests me in a cultural/historical way.  I try to pull out the Christmas decorations no earlier than the week of Thanksgiving (and preferably Dec 1, but there's something fun about having the tree up or decorating it on Thanksgiving).

The Yeti: He's not religious at all.  He's not a Scrooge, and he'll assist me if I need it, but I definitely have to take the lead in decorating or else there wouldn't be any.  He likes white Christmas lights, I prefer multicolored twinklers, in the past we've compromised with steady-burning multicolors because the twinkling drives him nuts and that's probably some sort of metaphor for our relationship.

Perhaps most notably, we place almost no emphasis on big Christmas gifts.  The Yeti likes buying stuff when he wants it/needs it, and does not like surprises.  I do like surprises and unwrapping things, so every year he gets me several little things (books or DVDs) and wraps them.  Usually they're connected to an inside joke, and sometimes I do the same for him if I see something really perfect, but he really is content with nothing (something that took me years to really understand and accept).  There's no pressure, nothing big or fancy, and it's meaningful and fun for each of us.

We have no idea how this is going to change as Thumper grows up.  We want him to be excited on Christmas morning, but we don't want him to be wrapped up solely in the materialistic aspects of the holiday; we know we want to work in compassion and charity in there, too.  We don't want Christmas to be a holiday where it's all about "topping" ourselves.  And then another issue is that his birthday is in January.  Lots of factors to consider there.

Then there's the Santa issue, which is just as complicated.  Neither the Yeti nor I are particularly nuts with the idea of playing Santa as a real entity, for different reasons.

Growing up, I was somewhat of a rube.  I heard my mother or one of my siblings say offhandedly that when you stop believing, Santa stops coming, and I took it literally.  It wasn't about the gifts; I was somehow afraid that the magic of Christmas would be diminished if I didn't believe.  So I forced myself to shut off my ears and brain and believe until a ridiculous age (12, maybe?  I mean I had my first little boyfriend at 12, such an awkward time).

Once I finally acknowledged the truth, I got to help play Santa for those younger than me, and of course the fun and magic wasn't diminished at all.  And I honestly wish I had saved myself the angst and anxiety.

For the Yeti, he thinks the entire idea of Santa is unfair - for example, if you come from a poor background like I did, it's unfair to make kids think that Santa is somehow ignoring their wishes if they don't get what they want, or, if they do, they're then thanking Santa instead of their hard-working parents.  He thinks it plays into the materialistic aspect, since really Santa is just about presents.

But, but!  It's fun to create magic and surprises for little kids.  And honestly, at a very young age, a kid is going to think a Mickey in a costume is the real character, right?  I distinctly remember watching Grover on Sesame Street and holding an internal debate over whether he was "a puppet" or "real."   On the one hand, I could see the strings.  On the other hand, he was hugging a little girl who clearly seemed to treat him as if he were real.  So maybe at a certain age, Santa will be just as real as Mickey or Grover regardless of what we do.

On the other hand, no one tries to perpetuate the notion that Mickey or Grover are the real thing.  Most people don't even try to act like Mall Santas are real.  And yet we all grew out of that stage with a minimum of drama.

So where we're at now is the idea of essentially following Thumper's lead.  Read books about Santa and other Christmas stories, like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and don't place particular weight on any one part of it, or any more than Olivia or any other character.   Currently I'm leaning away from the idea of writing Santa's name on gift tags.

The one memory I sort of stall on is from when I was a teenager, well into my playing Santa phase: it was the late 90s, and we discovered that the NORAD website had a Santa tracker.  I thought the idea of live 'reports' and tracking was the cutest thing ever.  That's what I think of when I think of preserving the Santa myth.  On the other hand, I think it could be fun whether you believe or not - after all, it was for me.

I have a feeling I'm overthinking again, and when Thumper is old enough for this to be an issue, it'll work itself out, one way or another.  Or maybe I'm just hoping that's what will happen.

Regardless of which way we fall on the Santa issue, as Thumper gets older I do want to incorporate and discuss other traditions from other cultures.  Back in 2011 I went on a trip to Berlin.  I stumbled into a winter festival and happened upon these guys:

Now I know that they were Krampuses, who are associated with St. Nicholas' day in early December.  And, of course, St. Nicholas, or St. Nick, is one of the origins of Santa Claus.  In the last few years Krampus has gotten more attention in the US and I was excited to buy a Krampus stocking: 

My hope is that in years to come, we'll put that up for Thumper to get an orange and celebrate St. Nicholas as well.  Krampus is such a good link between St. Nicholas and older traditions.  

And with Krampus we'll swing back into the spookiness of October.  I love hearing how others celebrate holidays - any of them - as well!